In Mandarin Chinese, the word “Dìdi” (弟弟) means younger brother and in writer/director Sean Wang‘s impressive feature-length film debut, the younger brother is on the awful angsty side of being a teen, learning how to skateboard, how to video, how to flirt and how to leave his childhood behind. Things will start with a bang and that’s not sexual, but quickly determine how you feel about our young protagonist and his besties.

Chris “Wang Wang” Wang (Isaac Wang) and his friends Fahad (Raul Dial) and Jimmy (Aaron Chang) have just blown up a metal mailbox, recording their deed on shaky cam video as they gleefully flee the site of their crime. It’s 2008 and there’s YouTube (launched in 2005) but Facebook hasn’t surpassed MySpace yet in its number of unique US visitors. That would happen in 2009. From 2005 to 2009, MySpace, which was launched in 2003, was the largest social networking site in the world.

The 13-year-old Chris lives in the San Francisco Bay area with his artistic mother Chungsing (Joan Chen), his paternal grandmother Nai Nai (Chang Li Hua) and his older sister Vivian (Shirley Chen). This is a family that doesn’t like each other and dinner time is a clear challenge for everyone. On this particular night, Vivian is disgruntled because her younger brother steals her sweatshirts and wears them.  Nai Nai criticizes her daughter-in-law; her son remains in Taiwan, totally absent from the whole film and seemingly from the life of his own son. Vivian and Chris call each other names and throw food. Their bad manners further fuel Nai Nai’s distain for her daughter-in-law.

As the writer, Sean Wang attempts to further divide his audience; Chris gets back at Vivian by peeing in her bottle of skin lotion. That should come with a warning: Don’t do this at home or maybe you already have. Yet this is the last month this foursome will live together as a family; Vivian will be leaving for Southern California and begin her first year at UCSD. What will that mean for Chris?

A lot of what Chris does has to do with his growing awareness of his place in the world and how it judges him.  He wants to look cool in sweatshirts that a college freshman would wear. When his more assertive friends begin acting on their interests in girls, Chris is pushed out of his comfort zone. On a particular trip to a miniature golf course, his friends leave him behind because with the girls, there’s no room in the car. Chris gets to ride a bus.

Only dumb luck gets Chris closer to the object of his affection Madi (Mahaela Park), whom he’s been pursuing silently via MySpace. Chris is socially awkward, but not creepy and although Chris is encouraged, due to his father’s absence and his acrimonious relationship with Vivian, he doesn’t get advice from his family on how to court or curry favor. Chris is also embarrassed by his mother and, like many angsty teens, convinced he does indeed hate his loving parent.  What could his mother possibly know about life in an internet savvy world?

And while the internet might promise quick and easy solutions via YouTube videos on things ranging from how to kiss to how to shoot skateboarding videos, watching videos won’t give one either sufficient expertise or calm confidence.

As Chris fumbles while making new friends, he will eventually turn toward his family for comfort. He doesn’t, however, rise into a completely changed, confident and popular kid as he watches his sister depart for UCSD and he finally enters high school.  Sean Wang doesn’t give simple solutions and syrupy surrender to happy Hallmark formulas. And that’s what makes this film so graceful and poignant.

People who have viewed Sean Wang’s 2023 Academy Award-nominated documentary short “Nǎi  Nai & Wài Pó” (奶奶跟外婆) about his maternal and paternal grandmothers living together in Fremont, California won’t be surprised by Sean Wang’s sensitivity and nuanced approach to the portrayal of women or older generations. In “Dìdi,” Joan Chen’s Chungsing, Chang Li Hua’s Nai Nai and Shirley Chen’s Vivian are not the enemy. The problems Chris faces are more nuanced than that and that’s a credit to both the sensitive writing and directing that elicits excellent and thoroughly believable performances from this cast. 

As a kid who never destroyed property, I was instantly against this young hooligan. As an adult who has experienced destructive vandalism, I was on the side of the poor home owner who had to replace a mailbox. As an older sister, I easily slid further into dislike of this younger brother. Still, Sean Wang as a director was able to pull me back into empathy for this young boy, entering high school with hope of new friendships within and out of his family.

What struck me most about ” is the haunting and pervasive absence of social cues and Chris’ struggle to understand the code-switching common to everyday life. In what is a functional single-parent home dominated by women, Chris doesn’t learn how one talks in single-gender groups versus one of mixed genders. Living in the US, Chris doesn’t learn how the humility shown in a language that uses self-effacing terms for the close and personal should be balanced by the praise and exaltation of the consumer, customer or guest.

You don’t have to be caught in cross-cultural chaos or have a younger brother to appreciate “Dìdi.” What adult hasn’t felt the uncertainty of leaving childish things behind to find and even redefine oneself as an adult?

“Dìdi” opens in theaters on 26 July 2024 and may herald  an important new voice in Asian American cinema.   The film made its world premiere at the 2024 Sundance Film Festival (19 January 2024) where it won the Audience Award (US Dramatic) and US Dramatic Special Jury Award for Ensemble.